Dress Shopping

Tuesday evening Light Bright and I headed out to go dress shopping. I didn’t realize how bad it would be until the “consultant” asked if she or Light Bright should help me change, and I said Light Bright. She said, “That’s what they usually say.” I didn’t know I’d have to get half naked in front of anyone, but better my old office mate than some stranger, right? Then I had to put on a flouncy slip and a strapless bra/corset type thing, and then I tried on the first dress. I knew it wouldn’t be good when Light Bright said,” … and you’re a giant cupcake.” I gamely went out to look in the mirrors anyway and was surrounded by a vision of myself buried under tons of crinoline. The bodice was pretty, but I couldn’t get past that skirt. And walking in it was nearly impossible! The next few dresses I tried were no better either, and it didn’t help when the consultant and Light Bright convinced me that I’d have to wear heels, so I put on some uncomfortable shoes. Just when I was feeling really fat and ugly and way too old to be trying on these princess dresses, Light Bright said, “Try this one.” I didn’t like the looks of it – all lacy and too old-fashioned in the bag – but she insisted that I try it on. I did, and suddenly I felt beautiful, like an actual blushing bride. The dress was easier to move in than the ones I was trying on before, and it was on clearance, so I said, “I’ll take this one.” Light Bright said we didn’t have to find one that night, but both she and the consultant agreed that one was really flattering on me. I can’t post photos until after the wedding, because Travalon reads this blog and it’s bad luck for him to see my dress. They can only take it in two sizes, so I can’t lose too much weight between now and then. Richard Bonomo says this time Murphy’s Law is working in my favor, and I’ll be totally fit by my wedding, so then who knows what I’ll do?

Famous Hat