Rosary Mystery Solved and Packers Season Over

 

The Packers' season is over, and if they had just lost cleanly I would say, "Too bad, but it was a good season." But this was a very suspicious game. When Brady was with the Patriots, everyone joked that there were never any penalties called on them, and now that he is with the Buccaneers, the same thing applies. Coincidence?? Or is it possible that Brady's statistically improbable career is as much due to paying off refs as it is to his famously bizarre age-fighting diet? Even Buck and Aikman, who are the biggest jerks ever to call football games and always hate on the Packers, were noting that there were a lot of non-calls of pass interference on the Bucs, and often with huge consequences, like a turnover. So then the Packers were way behind, because the Bucs were playing dirty (or as Buck and Aikman said, "The refs are letting them play"), but they battled back and were one score away from winning. That is the bright side of this game, I guess - the Packers still did so well when things were stacked against them. Then our corner Kevin King committed pass interference, and let me just be clear that I don't think he should have, but you can see why he thought it was allowed in this game. So of course the refs called it, at a time when the Bucs would have lost the ball and the Pack would have gotten one more chance to score. So... how convenient that they never call it on one team, but they call it on the other team at a moment that basically ends the game. Even Buck and Aikman, who are, as I said, HUGE Packers haters, noted the discrepancy. "They've been letting them play the whole game, and now they call pass interference?" I honestly believe someday the truth will come out about this, like it did about Lance Armstrong, who won the Tour de France a statistically improbable number of times. People can be amazingly talented, but if they never seem to have any competition, they are probably gaming the system somehow.

On a happier note, the rosary mystery has been solved! Remember these rosaries?

Apparently they are Right to Life rosaries. I couldn't figure out how to search for their meaning online, so I gave up and posted on MyFace. Bella Maryella knew right away what they were.

I knew there had to be a meaning to this configuration! When I asked Bella Maryella what terms she had searched under, she just gave my question an upvote, so she's keeping her secret closely guarded. Obviously I fail at searching for things online, because I only was able to find the music video for "American Dream" when I suddenly remembered last night that Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young sang the song (this is a memory from thirty-three years ago), and I was only able to solve the rosary mystery by appealing to the Hive Mind. At least both mysteries are now solved!

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Theresa Marsh

Did everyone get out to enjoy this weather? It was just as beautiful as yesterday. As opposed to last weekend, when our Slow Food buddy took this picture of us on the hill overlooking Horicon Marsh. You can kind of tell it was raining, but it's not a bad picture anyway.

My rosary sun catcher is done! It actually works - I prayed a rosary using it.

And this is how it looks hanging in our living room window.

This is the small pond at Meadow Ridge Park, the same park where the bluff is, in the neighborhood right next to ours. I assume the bluff is the "Meadow Ridge"?

Here is a picture from the car protest yesterday! The sign says: "F the 35s!" The F-35 fighter jets are rumored to be exceedingly loud, so those of us living near the airport would prefer that they not come to town. For some reason we were chosen, along with Montgomery, Alabama, the place where I got in a fight with an insect and lost. (Who knew luna moths were so strong that I couldn't move one from the sidewalk to the grass?) To add insult to injury, I think it was dying, but I had to enlist Travalon's help to move it.

This is what my rosary rack looks like at the moment, with nothing but junk mail rosaries on it because the other ones are up in the loft as part of my meta-rosary. I did like how these were all shades of blue and brown.

My neighbor was flying a kite this morning! It was so pretty in real life - this photo doesn't do it justice.

Today Travalon and I went to Theresa Marsh, which is east of Horicon Marsh. We saw lots of these cute little sandpiper things there, which I have never seen at Horicon.

We also saw this cool painted turtle on a rock. I tried to take photos of coots and a blue heron, but they did not turn out at all. However, when we came back along the path, the same turtle was on a different rock. I will let you choose which photo you like better.

Here is a shot of Theresa Marsh (and my car) from a slight hill behind it.

Then we went to Horicon Marsh and saw my buddy the white-headed goose. Maybe it really is a male, because it appeared to be patrolling around a nesting goose. Or do they take turns sitting on the nest? I'm afraid I really know very little about goose breeding habits.

For reference, here is a standard Canada goose. It has the same wings and white rump.

Then we went to Burke Town Park and walked around this odd little island that is a hill. I think some or all of this may be manmade.

We ended the afternoon by going to the Union, because I had forgotten to take pictures of the pier that drifted over to our side of the lake. We found a primo parking spot and cut through Alumni Park, where Travalon took this photo of me "riding" the Harley Davidson statue.

Here are some photos of the Hoofers pier, so that you can see how, when we looked through the binoculars, we thought a boardwalk had suddenly appeared across the river with white brick walls and towers on the gate. It looked like a very permanent structure to have sprung up overnight and then vanished again! Here you can see the "towers" are lights and the "walls" are storage bins.

And this is a close-up of one of the light structures, not out on that pier.

We headed back through Alumni Park, and I saw this cute little model of the Capitol Dome.

For reference, here is the actual Capitol Building.

Finally, we went to the co-op to buy food and coffee and dish soap, things like that, and since it is no longer Lent, I did buy myself this very cute little cactus.

So it was a wonderful weekend, and you could hardly beat the weather for this time of year!

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Protest in Cars and Boardwalk Mystery Solved

I hope my readers got to get outside to enjoy this beautiful weather. I had kind of an amazing day today. First we had a relaxed morning; I made the Vietnamese egg coffee again, and I took a walk with our neighbor. Then Travalon and I participated in a protest against the F-35 fighter jets coming to Madison, but because of social distancing we had to protest in our cars. We joined a line of cars that paraded around the Capitol, beeping our horns to the rhythm of "This is what democracy looks like!" Someone even gave us a sign to display. Travalon's Lexus is in the shop right now, but we fit in with all these aging hippies in my little Honda Civic. Then we walked down State Street and went to a favorite restaurant that was open for takeout, but they let us eat in a secret outdoor garden that nobody can see from the street, so we tipped them 25% to thank them. Our clandestine lunch!

We took a long walk along the Lakeshore Path, and on the way back we noticed the pier that was part of the new Hoofers marina that I donated to. (Remember? I was invited to the swanky soiree to dedicate it.) It had two tall white things on it that looked like gate posts, a semi-circle of white storage compartments that looked kind of like walls, and the rest looked like a boardwalk. That's right, I think we have solved the mystery of where the disappearing boardwalk came from! Can you believe it? It either drifted or was blown all the way across the lake from the Union to the marsh! That explains why it was such a fancy one (with locked storage compartments, per the report of our neighbor who took his paddle board over to check it out) - it didn't belong to some obscenely rich person living on the lake, but to the Hoofers! It all makes sense now, except for the part where some wealthy family donated a ton of money to build this thing, and whoever put it in didn't secure it properly. Right now you can't go out on it, but I already did when it was dedicated, so in fact I have walked on the mysterious disappearing boardwalk!

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Disappearing Boardwalk Explained

Remember when Travalon and I saw what seemed to be a boardwalk with a gate that appeared at the edge of the marsh? And then when we tried to find a path to it, it had vanished completely? I can't say the mystery is totally solved, but I do have more information, courtesy of our neighbor who spends a lot of time on his paddle board. As any normal person with a paddle board would do, he went over to examine the "boardwalk," which he said was a very nice floating pier that had somehow become detached, floated away, and got stuck at the edge of the marsh. He didn't walk on it, but he noticed there were some storage bins on it... that were locked, he added. "Couldn't steal any stuff," he joked, or at least I assume he was joking, since he does not seem like the sort of person who steals. Then I felt better, knowing Travalon and I had not imagined this sight. In fact, another neighbor claims the floating pier was in the marsh all winter, but that seems hard to believe - surely I would have noticed it sooner than this past Saturday, especially since I was out and about walking Michaela so much. Anyway, nobody I talked to knows who owns the floating pier, but we all assume the local pier repair business (which apparently is an "essential business," since their boat has been out and about constantly) towed the pier back to its rightful place and secured it. So mystery at least partly solved. Stay tuned in case more information becomes available...

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Mysterious Vanishing Boardwalk

Last night, after I wrote, I took a list of my favorite salsa songs that I had found while cleaning, and I listened to the ones I didn't remember or hadn't heard in a while. (I compiled this list about a dozen years ago.) Some of them were so good! I was really dancing around to them, and that put me in such a good mood. Maybe all we need to get through this social isolation is some Latin music.

Today as soon as I got off work, Travalon and I went for a hike to find the mysterious boardwalk and gate that we had seen in the marsh further down the river. We kept seeing these little hearts in the woods.

We found a path that went beside the lake, and it had some stunning views.

One thing we did not find was a path that went to the mysterious boardwalk. I thought of going to the other side of the river, across from where we had seen it, but we couldn't see anything. So we went home, and I went out on the dock, and sure enough, there was no sign of it! I would think I was going crazy, but Travalon saw it too, and we looked at it through our binoculars. It looked like some sort of permanent structure, and now it has vanished! What a mystery!

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Missing Sombrero-Wearing Chihuahua

It was a number of years ago, but when I was well into adulthood, that one year for Christmas there was a big present… for me! I unwrapped it to find a box that said: “Space Heater.” Wow, what a great present! Thoughtful and useful! My young relations were giggling and said, “No, open the box!” and inside was a stuffed Chihuahua approximately two and a half times the size of a real one, with a sombrero on its head. And it sang, “Feliz Navidad.” It wasn’t quite like opening a jewelry box to find a plastic toy, but it was pretty close to opening a box of high-quality chocolates to find black jellybeans – you think you are getting something wonderful that you really want, and instead you get something annoying that you have zero use for. (Apologies to my readers who actually like black jellybeans, and I promise that I won’t question your mental state… out loud.)

I did find a use for the Chihuahua: entertaining Hardingfele’s young daughter. Then the battery wore out, and I was unmotivated to replace it. However, I made a Cinco de Mayo video of something approximating a mariachi song, and the Chihuahua was perfect to star in it. Just yesterday a friend needed a Mexican prop for a class, and I thought of the Chihuahua, but although Travalon and I searched everywhere, we couldn’t find it. And this thing is not small – it is just about the size of a space heater. Maybe it is at Rich’s house, with Aloysius the demented praying mantis that sings five equally grating vaguely Christian children’s songs? Maybe I gave it away? Do any of my readers have any idea?

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Mystery Winter Boat

I think I am working in the right department. Here is someone’s sense of humor: under the bathroom sign that says, “Women,” someone put another sign that says, “Damen,” which is of course German for the same thing, and then under that someone put yet another sign that says, “Dames.” On the men’s side, under the sign that says, “Men” someone put one that says, “Herren,” and then under that someone put a photo of a heron. We also have a billboard with humorous memes on it, and the latest one that went up today says, “You can really only call the monster Frankenstein if it comes from the Frankenstein region of France. Otherwise, it is just a sparkling monster.” That made me laugh for five minutes straight. And yes, I do know the monster is not “Frankenstein” but “Frankenstein’s monster.” It’s still funny.

Monday when I went for a walk during my lunch break, I saw something strange: a boat on the lake! There is a thin layer of ice on the lake, so I’m not sure how or why this boat was out there, but it was moving very loudly and slowly on the far side of the lake. I texted Travalon and said it was in Warner Bay, could he get a closer look, but by the time he got there, he didn’t see anything. It appeared to be a white power boat with a yellow thing sticking off the front. The next day I emailed my contact in the Limnology Department, figuring it was one of theirs studying the lake, but she said it wasn’t theirs. Then it was back! I told her it was back, and she emailed back a few minutes later to say they had looked at it through powerful binoculars, and it was a white boat with a large yellow thing sticking off of it, so there you go. It hasn’t made an appearance today, so this mystery may never be solved.

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"Spare Time" Mystery

Sorry for my silence the last few days. I had a terrible cold and didn’t feel like blogging, besides having nothing to say. Yesterday I made an attempt to go back to work but left after half a day. As I was riding the bus, I saw a truck labeled “Smooth Moves Inc” make a right turn from the left-hand lane, cutting off a car. You can’t make this stuff up. You do see crazy things on the bus; a few weeks ago we saw a police car being towed, and it didn’t appear to be damaged, so my bus buddy and I speculated that it had parked illegally. Is that even possible?

Here my story takes a darker turn. The bus went around the square, and I looked up at the roof where “Spare Time” should have been… and there was nothing there! Even more strangely, it looked like someone had just taken it down, because I swear I saw someone's head and the top of the sculpture over the edge of the roof. I immediately emailed the city clerk to demand to know why they were removing my favorite piece of artwork. Someone got back to me right away and copied the city art commissioner, saying he hadn’t heard they were planning to do that. Then the commissioner chimed in, saying she didn’t know anything about it either. So the mystery deepens… Was it frat boys? Was it an unauthorized removal by the building owners? Is the sculpture just being cleaned? The commissioner said she would get back to both of us when she found out more, so stay tuned.

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Ode to Mysterious Lights

I have nothing to blog about today, since last night was a quiet evening at home for me while Travalon went to the Bucks playoff game. (He did win a Greek Freak jersey, which I am wearing today since it doesn’t fit him.) I wrote in my diary Mariah, ran in place to music, and played around on my bouzouki. A lot of fun, but not much to read about. It must be time for another poem:

Mysterious lights in the distance,

So beautiful, they beckon to me

From the far side of Lake Monona.

What could those lovely lights be?

Look at that low row of red lights.

I must know what they illuminate.

Could it be someplace amazing?

Could finding it be my fate?

What if below those lights

Is a place where ideas can flow

As people make glass and ceramics?

I tell you, I really must know!

What is that sparkling tower?

The most beautiful thing I can see!

Of course, it could just be a smokestack

For some random factory.

Still, the searching is so much fun,

Even if the finding is lame.

Looking for mysterious lights

Is such a delightful game!

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Pursuing Mysterious Lights

This is sort of silly, but I get fascinated with the lights I see in the distance from the Monona Terrace. My readers may remember how I spent several years trying to figure out what a low building with red lights was, only to discover it was just a strip mall. However, that strip mall contains both Crema Café, a wonderful place to get brunch, and Fired Up, a wonderful place to make fused glass, so discovering what the lights were was no waste of time. Recently I had noticed a strange set of lights in the distance, something new that hadn’t been there before. It was near some radio towers, but it was more lit up than the radio towers, with sparkly lights all the way up its height. Travalon and I tried to figure out where it could be, and we took one ride looking for it on Cottage Grove Road but were unsuccessful. I noticed during the day that whatever this tall object was, it looked a bit like a mosque, with a lower, rounder building and a tall thing like a minaret, and it was behind a large green water tower. I knew the water tower was right behind the high school in Monona, so if the other object were a bit further back, it was probably in an industrial park where Stoughton Road and Pflaum Road intersect. Last night Travalon said let’s take a ride over there, and we found the tower all lit up. It is something for a company that produces gases for welding, so nothing as immediately useful to me as the lights that turned out to be the strip mall, but I was still happy to have found what it was. Maybe if I ever have need of gas for welding, this knowledge will come in handy.

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Wonderful Fourth of July Weekend

Sorry for my silence; I really have no excuse for not blogging yesterday, but Travalon and I sat out on our dock for a long time, watching boats coming and going. We saw one particularly majestic sailboat pass by, with a light on the top of the mast. It was so beautiful. As for what I was up to this holiday weekend, Friday I went to the outdoor fish fry at Quivey’s Grove with Travalon, Rich, OK Cap, the Single B-Boy, Cecil Markovitch, and another couple. It was a beautiful evening.

Saturday I met with Jilly Moose and OK Cap for coffee and the Rosary, then Travalon and I joined Rich, Cecil, the Single B-Boy, and Antoshka for a hiking adventure. (Though I’m sure Rich will say it wasn’t “hiking” because we didn’t have 50-pound packs on our backs.) Our first destination was Gibralter Rock, a steep climb to the top of a bluff with an incredible view, although I couldn’t get too close to the edge because of my fear of heights. We took the Merrimac Ferry over the river and went to Parfry’s Glen, a very pretty walk that gets adventurous towards the end. There used to be a boardwalk, but it washed away and they never replaced it, so now you have to jump from rock to rock over a stream and then scramble over large rocks to get to a waterfall. We took the ferry back over the river and had dinner at Fitz’s on the Lake, sitting outside and admiring the view of Lake Wisconsin. Of course half of us were facing away from the lake, so Cecil suggested we rotate, which we all did every twenty minutes except for Antoshka. He had the best view, so he refused to budge. That is par for the course for him. Our last stop was Ferry’s Bluff, and we got to the top just as twilight was falling, so lots of cranes and whippoorwills were calling to each other. A young family had beaten us there, and they said they were going to watch the Sauk City fireworks from there, so we stayed and did so as well. I have never watched fireworks from a bluff before! It was pretty cool. The Dairyman's Daughter was in Sauk City watching the same fireworks, so afterwards she stopped by briefly to say hello.

Sunday Travalon and I explored a place right near our home that our neighbors had told us about, with hiking trails and boardwalks right by the channel out to Lake Mendota. How cool to find something new right in your own backyard! We got together with some other people and played board games, then afterwards he and I went to the East Side Club and sat by the lake, watching fireworks in the distance and the Betty Lou Cruise go by.

Monday I had my regular adoration hour, so Travalon and I had brunch at Short Stack, and then he joined me for my hour in the chapel. We went out to the Nature Conservancy land just outside of Spring Green, where the cacti are in glorious bloom, and we hiked the whole trail. It goes up a steep bluff too – we certainly got a lot of climbing in this weekend! Saturday we climbed the equivalent of 32 flights of stairs! Of course, there was a gorgeous view at the top of the trail. We had been alone the whole time, but on our way back we kept seeing people. In the evening we took a Betty Lou fireworks cruise; we had done the Lake Mendota one last year, but they were sold out this year so we did the Lake Monona one. That was so much fun! The boat was much smaller and more rugged than the one we took with Ma and Pa Hat, but I liked it because you really felt like you were on a boat. We passed those mysterious lights I always see from the Monona Terrace, and it’s just a strip mall. The funniest part is that it is on the left side of the street as you are heading east, and I was always looking on the other side, since that’s closer to the lake. Mystery solved! There is a coffee house there my coworker says is really good, and a little restaurant she cannot vouch for. We passed the East Side Club and saw people on the lawn looking at the lake, just like we had been the night before. We watched the Monona fireworks from the boat and enjoyed the view of the Monona Terrace at night as we were returning to port. I tried to take some photos, but they didn’t really turn out. Someday I will post photos of all this, I promise!

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Easy McGee and the Case of the Coffee Supplies

Easy McGee is on the case of the Missing Coffee Cups and Filters. As my readers may remember, here at work we had a safe stolen out of a supply closet, and contained within that safe were dozens of Styrofoam coffee cups. That case has never been solved, and the safe has never resurfaced, nor have the coffee cups. The plot thickens, because last week the thief struck again, and this time s/he stole… about a hundred coffee filters! Considering the low price of said item, this cannot be a case of a desperate person who just needs a few filters to make enough coffee to get through the day. I thought I had a clue:

I posted a sign apologizing for the missing coffee filters and explaining that they had been stolen. Not an hour later, several filters mysteriously reappeared.

However, this mystery has been solved: a coworker borrowed six filters from the 4th floor. Toque McToque and I speculated that someone from the 4th floor had stolen the hundred filters, and the six were simply returned to their rightful home. But we have reason to think it was an inside job, or else the cleaning people. Time to get Easy McGee on the case, we decided.

To Be Continued…

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Mysteries of Life

Today I slept in till noon, got up, and took a nap, but I did have time to do a few productive things, like ponder the following mysteries:

Why is it that plots that seem utterly compelling in a dream don't make any sense when you wake up?  For example, I am eternally working on a novel, let's call it The Great American Hat Novel, and today I had a dream that the hats would all meet in New Orleans on Spring Break, when one hat was escaping from a vicious employer and the other hats provided refuge in their hotel room... and then I woke up and thought, "That makes no more sense than the way the story is now."  Less, even.  But it was so great in the dream!  (Maybe Hardingfele can comment on this, since she is the only one who has read this book - besides me - and her assessment of it was, "It was so weird that I couldn't put it down!"  Would New Orleans on Spring Break make you even less likely to put it down?)

Why did my office mate Light Bright leave me a chirpy message saying she had hooked up the filter on my small aquarium the Tallis Palace, and it was working very well so I wouldn't have to come in to clean out the Tallis Palace, but when I stopped by this evening the filter was turned off, the Palace was filthy, and Tallis and Taverner are at Death's doorstep?  If it was working so well, why did she turn it off?  If she didn't turn it off, who did?  This is the kind of mystery that makes me want to never return to work.  In fact, it makes me want to change my identity, burn my fingerprints off with acid, and move to Mexico.  Is someone trying to give me a message, the kind of message other people get with horse heads in their beds?  I have never appreciated people making innocent animals suffer to send a message to other people.  You got something to say, say it to me - leave my fish out of it.

Do you think if I went down to New Orleans I could find some fun people on vacation who would give me refuge in their hotel room? 

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The Ugly Chick

I know the title of this blog post sounds as if I am going to discuss myself, but it actually refers to the picture below, which was taken by Banjo Player. If you look closely at the baby chicks (ducklings?) in this photo, all of them are yellow except for the little gray one on the left side of their food bowl. What happened there? Is it a different breed or species? Or does Daddy suspect the mailduck? How did Mama explain that one when all the eggs hatched?


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Questions to Ponder

Last night I was discussing with Richard Bonomo how we could make my Anglo-Saxploitation flick, aka. Beowulf meets Shaft, and I said using hats might be too hard so maybe we could do stop-motion using drinking glasses. "After all," I said, "one of those amber-colored goblets you have would be perfect for Beowulf. And one of the tiki glasses my folks have would make a fantastic Grendel's mother." Rich allowed as how he had never actually considered what kind of drinking glass would make the most ideal actors for a movie version of Beowulf, shockingly enough. This got me to wondering about other questions I have pondered that likely have not been pondered by other people... and it's high time they should be!

What's it like to be a red blood cell? Why has nobody written a novel yet from the point of view of one?

Do ferns remember that their ancestors used to rule the world? Do they ever think to themselves, "Darn those angiosperms! We would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those meddling blooming plants!"

At the Epiphany service at the Lutheran church, they kept invoking God with these weird titles I had never heard before, like "Inclusive God" and "Welcoming God." The Moslems have 99 names for God, but they are not that out there. I wonder what the oddest title is that God has been called? And which one is His favorite?

Should @$$hole be an ethnicity? But if it were, would they demand special protections? Would @$$holephobia become a crime? Would you be able to get a BS in @$$hole Studies from your more PC four-year universities? And what kind of job could you get with that?

Who would take it in a smackdown, a dime or a nickel? A dime is worth more, but the nickel has the size advantage.

I wonder if they will ever come up with a use for pumpkin guts and that little stem on the top? Then pumpkins would be the most efficient thing ever. You could use every part!

What were the people doing who discovered you could eat truffles or that you can write dirty words upside-down on a calculator? Were they actually trying to do that or did they discover it by accident?

Am I crazy for wondering these things? Don't answer that, unless you are trying to get an advanced degree in @$$hole Studies.

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Mystery City Wants YOU!!

Today in the mail I got yet another ad for our trainees, letting them know there is a wonderful job opportunity...somewhere. However, this one really caught my attention because it does not want to say where it is. The front is a beautiful postcard photo of water and deciduous trees:


On the back there are tantalizing hints, but no indication of where this place is, other than somewhere in the United States. It gives the following clues:

• Very progressive city
• Strongest economy in mystery state
• Warm climate
• Wonderful family-oriented community
• Two major universities
• Perennial hotbed of economic development
• Idyllic lifestyle known throughout mystery state
• Volunteerism is a passion here
• School system continues to lead the mystery state in test scores
• A number of national chains have recently opened because of area's prosperity
• A Tom Fazio designed golf course ranked #1 in mystery state by Golf Digest
• You can play golf all year long!

I mean, this place sounds like paradise, at least if you are a progressive with two kids in college and another in K-12 and you love to shop at national chains and play golf when you are not busy volunteering. So why are they so reluctant to tell you the name of the Mystery City or even the Mystery State? Our trainees currently live in this icebox of a state that (true story) some Brits mistake for a province of Canada, so I can't imagine they would have that much against some other state, especially if you can play golf there all year long. (Heck, we can do that too - haven't they ever heard of indoor golf?) So I am wondering, faithful readers, if you have any idea where this place might be. Some guesses:

Austin, Texas - a progressive city in a state where people drive their Bugattis into the lake and then blame it on pelicans

Tulsa, Oklahoma - just because they think nobody would believe there could be anything cool in Oklahoma

Minot, North Dakota - they're lying about the warm climate

Omaha, Nebraska - it's warmer than Minot!

Anywhere in the Panhandle of Florida or the Appalachian Mountains - they promise all your clients won't be inbred freaks!

Wherever this place is, it needs some more self-esteem. Come on, Mystery City, Mystery State! You can't be so uncool that you can't even mention your own name for fear of scaring off all prospective employees!

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