Yesterday morning I drove over a curb, but Noelle the Honda doesn't seem any worse for wear, and the rest of the day went fine. This morning I stepped on Boethius my computer and heard an ominous crack, but he seems to be working just fine as well - I am writing this blog post on him right now - and the rest of the day went fine. I don't have much to say, so I'll tell you about a theory that came up during Night Prayer.
One fine summer day many years ago, Tiffy and I were hanging out on the Union Terrace, and as I gazed at the lake, I wondered what had become of the Lake Mendota Monster. This was a thing back in the 1920's, when there were numerous reports of it knocking over boats - in fact, one year they didn't have crew team because it kept knocking them over. The theory was that it was a sturgeon, and after a few years there were no more reports about it. Of course, at this point it would be a century old, but it's a monster, so why not? I said I wonder if it ate people, and Tiffy thought maybe it was cold-blooded and only needed to eat once in a while, so that's when we came up with our theory: the Lake Mendota Monster only needs to eat twice a year, so it invented two big parties about six months apart, the Mifflin Street Block Party in early May and the Halloween Party in late October. These parties are infamous, and people come from all over to go to them, so it's perfect cover for the monster. It's very careful to only eat, say, stoners who hitchhiked here from Boulder, Colorado. Nobody here in Madison would realize they disappeared, and their roommates in Boulder would be like, "Dude, I don't know where he went. He said something about a party in Madison, Wisconsin." It's the perfect cover, and the monster has gotten away with it for years.
Famous Hat
No comments:
Post a Comment