Many years ago I did a bad thing with Tiffy and went to a
palm reader. She told me I would live to be 105, and so ever since then I have
been planning to live a very long life. Recently I was reading about Jeanne Calment, the woman who lived to be 122, in order to get some tips. Apparently
she smoked two cigarettes a day; I am not planning to take up smoking as a
hobby, but I do enjoy a hookah maybe once a year. She also ate lots of
chocolate and olive oil and drank port every day. I already enjoy dark chocolate
and olive oil, so it made sense to add the third ingredient and buy a bottle of
port at the store this week. (No word on whether Ms. Calment drank coffee, but
if she did, then I’m looking really good.) Whether this will make me live a
long life, I can’t say, but I can see where it would make a person WANT to live
a long life. How wonderful it is to eat chocolate and drink port after a dinner
that includes olive oil! Last night I did just that, and then I took the bus downtown
to pray the rosary at the Capitol for religious freedom, and man was I happy!
It was like the best rosary ever. So I advocate this diet for all my readers;
the only thing is, you have to ramp up your exercise and/or eat less of
something else to make up for all the calories in chocolate, port, and olive
oil. Maybe take a page from the book of Jeanne Calment and bike, swim, play
tennis, and take up fencing at the age of 85.
Famous Hat
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