Tropical Shower

Yesterday was my bridal shower, and it was so much fun! It was at Macha Tea House, and lots of ladies attended, wearing Hawaiian shirts and colorful leis which they then put around my neck. (I will post a photo at some point.) As Catzookz said, “Now you’re finally getting lei’d!” Light Bright and Tiffy organized the whole thing, and Jilly Moose took photos. Hardingfele gave me cookie sheets, OK Cap gave me a frame and coasters, Tiffy gave me a cake carrier, a friend who does not have a name on this blog but calls herself the Dairyman’s Daughter gave me a frame and a pillow Travalon put on our registry, Light Bright gave me thank you cards (what a brilliant idea!), and Mo-Girl gave me macadamia nuts and a beautiful acacia wood bowl to serve them in. Jilly Moose and Luxuli gave me luggage, and Kathbert and Catzookz gave me the “cocktail” gift: martini glasses, coasters of composers (all Baroque except for Brahms, how random), cocktail umbrellas, palm tree stir sticks, and a book called Tequila Mockingbird that Kathbert had learned about on public radio. It has cocktails based on great literary works, so one is called “The Confederacy of Ounces” (instead of Dunces) and I can’t remember any others offhand, but they were all quite clever. This was all in a basket which Kathbert had on the back of her bike, then she forgot it was there and fell over it while dismounting, scraping her cheek badly. Always one for tact, Hardingfele took one look at her and said, “You look awful!”

Then there was the gift from Handy Woman and another coworker: gift cards to Orange Tree Imports and Macha Tea House, and what Light Bright euphemistically labeled “chocolate friend” on the gift list she kept for me. It was about eight inches long, made of Belgian chocolate, and what can I say? Nobody in the room that afternoon had one. Of course I opened this gift first. Handy Woman had received it as a birthday present, so she had shown it to me back then, and I remembered it being larger. When I opened it yesterday, my first words were, “I thought it was bigger than this!” which set all the girls howling. Nobody seemed offended, and Luxuli later told me she was glad someone gave me a naughty gift! I thought maybe we could eat it right then, but after all the scones and cupcakes and little sandwiches, we were too full.

Then, to my surprise, my OTHER choir director and a bass from that choir crashed our party – they hadn’t even known we would be there! We tried to get them to take some leftover food, but they had their own, so I brought it to Richard Bonomo’s house. Somehow Rich found out about my chocolate friend (when I said, “I don’t know how it came up!” Kathbert practically snorted tea out of her nose), and he said he wanted to try it, but I don’t think he quite understood until we said, “It’s very anatomically correct,” and then he was not interested. He claims (and Luxuli seconds this) that I called it a “woman’s helper” when trying to describe it, but I don’t remember using that phrasing, and Kathbert agreed that no woman would call it a “helper.” We kept laughing about it, which was bad because laughing hurt Kathbert’s sore face, but we couldn’t stop making terrible innuendos.

Today my boss was out sick, and my coworker who would have complained was out, so I brought my chocolate friend to share with Handy Woman and my gay coworker. He said he doesn’t like chocolate, so I figured Handy Woman and I could have some now and save the rest for my bachelorette party, but when I cut into it, it was hollow! We weren’t expecting that. Good thing we didn’t try to eat it at my shower – each lady would have just gotten a tiny bite! Handy Woman and I finished it off, which was a very un-Lenten thing to do, but they say you only have a finite amount of willpower, and I used my allotment up today just getting up and going to the UGGH Club. We thought it was so much fun being naughty at work like that, eating my chocolate friend. It came in a pretty little tin that looks like a house, so nobody suspected a thing.

Famous Hat